Post-birthday joke

Yeah, I just turned 18. I will be hitting the clubs when I go to New York next week.

But more importantly, I came up with an amazing joke not ten minutes ago. Here goes:

---What do you call the act of using fruit as a sexual aphrodisiac?
-Umm, gee whilikers, dude, I dunno! What do you call that.

(Scroll down)



















Statuatory grape.


Bahahahaha.

I'm not dead...

Not yet!

I've been without a laptop for a little bit, so I haven't posted in over a month. Unfortunately, I don't have much to say other than I'm glad to almost be done with my first semester of school. I wrote a paper on the Ejército Zapatista de Liberación Nacional for my Spanish class, and I might post that at some point.

My birthday is in a few days, finals are almost over, and the holidays are here. I'm off to New York next week to celebrate the holidays with my family minus my sister. Fun times.

Fuck public transportation...

Seriously, nothing more needs to be said.

Yeah, I know I'm not 18...

It pisses me off that people over 18 are quick to silence those not of age simply because of the age difference. What kind of bullshit is that? I have an opinion, and even though it technically won't matter in this election, I have the right to express my opinion.

That being said, I don't want to get too idealistic, but I just can't help but be baffled by Palin supporters. And while she isn't running for president, she may have to eventually fill the position. A woman that won't answer a question directly, religiously force fed, and let's face it, just so fucking idiotic. I'm all for the rights of women, and I would definitely love to see a woman in the White House one day, but fuck, not her.

Another thing that scares me is a possible assassination attack on Barack Obama. Obviously with the constant threats being taken care of, it makes me feel a little more at ease. However, I just get to thinking how this situation would put us back decades, and how we would have to work that much harder to better this country.

And so, I have decided that if Senator Obama is assassinated in his tenure as president, I am moving to Canada. You think I'm bullshitting you, but as I'm growing older, I think about it more and more. It's just the mere fact that a lot of people in this country waste their brilliance on ignorant matters. Can we not accept a man of color, nay, HALF color in our oval office? God forbid what would happen if a full African American entered the White House.

Most people making this threat to exit the country seem to only be behind the idea if John McCain is elected. I don't think I'd move out of this place if that were the case, but another important factor to keep in mind is whether how much life is left in that man? I appreciate McCain's services and everything positive he has done for this country, but I'm not a supporter, that's all.

Bottom line: Fuck you for thinking that people under 18 shouldn't voice their opinion, and if Obama is assassinated or Palin takes over the White House, I'm knocking at Chris Colohan's door and telling him to get Cursed and The Swarm back together (in that order).

Fuck you very much,

Mario

Unnecessary Person(s)

I haven't posted in about a month, so I figured I'd get off my ass and type something up here. This evening, I'm here to talk to you about how there is an overabundance of photographers these days.

Now, I have two close friends that are stellar amateur photographers, and I appreciate and support their work. What pisses me off though is how pretty much everyone these days thinks they can point their camera at an object and call it "art" or "photography in its truest form." These kids consist of 15 year old, "political" hippies. They take a camera, go into a field of exuberant flowers, snap photographs at terrible angles, go onto their computers that their filthy rich parents spoiled them with, and photoshop the crap out of said photographs.

What do I say to these youngsters? Fuck them. Fuck every single thing about them. Just as in any other art form, support the artists that pour their complete being into their work. Support artists that show heart, emotion, and invoke thought through their respective art.

Plugs:



David G. Photography
www.myspace.com/davidgphotos



Shire Photography
www.myspace.com/ryanwphoto


Dianna Augustine Photography (Professional photographer)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/d_saygoodbye/

Wake me when it's springtime in heaven...

That's my little babe, Kaitlin Espinoza. She was always independent, outgoing, but still very warm and sweet. She made me smile when I didn't think I had one in me. She showed me how attached a pet owner could get to the pet. :)

I will always remember the times she would wake me up in the middle of the night and crawl right between my legs. I will always remember finding her sprawled out on my living room couch late at night. I will always remember how cute she looked playing with string. I will always remember holding her in my arms, rocking her to sleep. I will remember the first time she came to my house on my father's birthday. I will always remember loving her just as I love my sister. I will always remember Kaitlin, no matter what.

If there's a heaven I believe in, it's kitty heaven. I know you're there, babe, and you're going to live in happiness, where pain isn't in the dictionary.

I love you Kaitlin, and I'm going to miss you.

RIP

Just take deep breaths...

Recently, a girl I knew in high school had to deal with losing her current partner.  Obviously she wasn't the only one effected by the unexpected death of her loved one; I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like to bury your own child.  Life is beautiful, and it can harshly be snatched away in an instant. 

So, I got to thinking.  I thought about a lot of the trivial things I've argued with my girlfriend about, and really, how pointless some of it was.  Even today, I've said things that make me seem like a real jerkoff.  Why do I say these things?  Sometimes, I really don't even know.

But, what if it was Mary that was taken away?  A woman that I've been in love with for almost 3 years, just suddenly taken from me?  How does one, especially a person as young as I am or the girl who lost her boyfriend, learn to deal with such great pain?  Is it possible?

It's sad that it takes the death of another to make me thankful for some of the things and people I have in my life.  Some people, unfortunately, never get to experience falling in love.  They can never fathom the feeling of just staring into their partners' eyes and doing absolutely nothing else, but yet not wanting to do anything else.  Why would you want to?

Almost 3 years, and I love this woman more than I ever have before.  

And to the girl who has been so devastated, so broken-hearted, I am sorry.  Life is unpredictable, and even though we can never truly change it, we have others to support us in our time of need.

I never knew you, but wherever you may roam, I hope you are at peace.

RIP Adam Howard.

Not my words...

...But words to live by.

"Marcos is gay in San Francisco, black in South Africa, an Asian in Europe, a Chicano in San Ysidro, an anarchist in Spain, a Palestinian in Israel, a Mayan Indian in the streets of San Cristobal, a gang member in Neza, a rocker in the National University, a Jew in Nazi Germany, an ombudsman in the Defense Ministry, a communist in the post-Cold War era, an artist without gallery or portfolio.... A pacifist in Bosnia, a housewife alone on Saturday night in any neighborhood in any city in Mexico, a striker in the CTM, a reporter writing filler stories for the back pages, a single woman on the subway at 10 pm, a peasant without land, an unemployed worker... an unhappy student, a dissident amid free market economics, a writer without books or readers, and, of course, a Zapatista in the mountains of southeast Mexico. So Marcos is a human being, any human being, in this world. Marcos is all the exploited, marginalized and oppressed minorities, resisting and saying, 'Enough'!"

I apologize to my friend David in advance...

Forgive me David, but I have to get something off of my chest.

The man posted above is a rapper that goes by the stage name "Lil' Wayne".  He, along with Soulja Boy, have ruined hip-hop for me.  At least recently, anyway.  Before a couple of days ago, I never really paid attention to the so called "music" he put out, and I sort of wish I would have kept it that way.

This man lacks talent, lacks heart, lacks respect; fuck it, he just sucks overall.  There is nothing that can or will come out of this guy that will be good.  A truckload of failure.  Holy shit.

/rant

2008 Recommendations

This year has shown some great releases, and although I won't be providing download links this time, maybe I will at a later time. Be sure to support these artists when they roll through your area!

Cursed - III: Architects Of Troubled Sleep
Disfear - Live The Storm
Rotten Sound - Cycles
Thrice - The Alchemy Index: Vol. 3 & 4
Clouds - We Are Above You
Meshuggah - obZen
Trash Talk - s/t
Indian - Slights And Abuse/The Sychophant
Torche - Meanderthal
Advent - Remove The Earth
Nachtmystium - Assassins: Black Meddle Pt. 1
Blacklisted - Heavier Than Heaven, Lonelier Than God
Boris - Smile
Cult Of Luna - Eternal Kingdom
United Nations - s/t
Immortal Technique - The Third World
Opeth - Watershed

Those are just some of my personal favorites so far from this year, and there still many amazing albums to be released. Keep your eyes peeled for the new Toxic Holocaust, Giant, Mastodon, Jacob Bannon, and Thursday records.

-Mario

The Earth Will Shake.

Punch the clock and assume the position...

My life as a college student began this past Monday, August 18th. I had to wake up at 5:30 in the morning so I could grab a ride from my dad; for those who don't know, I don't drive. I will starting this December, though! But that's beside the point. I got to school at 6:30ish, a full 1 and 1/2 hours before my first class. Not only did that make me angry, it helped me make LCC history. I was literally the first student on campus for the Fall 2008 semester. Total win.

The man who was there had literally just gotten to the building where I was, and I saw him unlock the building, turn on the lights, etc. Pretty awesome stuff, if you ask me. I waited around for a while, just hanging out, and I even saw a couple of familiar faces. Time went on, and it was time for time for my career at LCC to begin. Where better to start than a remedial math course?

MAT 070 - yes, MAT with no "h", was my first class at 8 AM. High school algebra all over again. I thought I was done with you forever! Our teacher, Kevin Parker, seemed like a solid guy and I'm currently getting along with him just fine. The past couple of days has been pretty basic stuff, so not much needs to be said here.

Had an hour break, so I got some grub. For any LCC students reading this, the grill at the student center rules. I bought a sausage/egg/cheese sandwich, and it was one of the best I've ever had. Get on that shit.

ENG 111 - Expository Writing. I have a few friends in this class, so it doesn't seem so bad thus far. Christine Bates, my instructor, seems like a personable, family type of woman. Not very intimidating, which was my expectation for my English teacher.

I'm going to go into detail here because we had a reading assignment on a lady named Nancy Mairs (if my memory serves me correctly), a radical feminist and pacifist who suffers from Multiple Sclerosis. Her essay portrayed the media as it truly is -- domineering. The media in this age, is such a double standard. Every day we hear about trivial things, who broke up with who, which person died, but in the end, its almost as if it always falls back on the "beautiful" and "perfect" people.

Mairs' main point in the essay is that she would like to see more people with disabilities to be portrayed on television. Obviously, this is seen as troublesome by many. It shows vulnerability, and it shows how spineless the media can be. We ostracize those who are different thant us, and that's the way it always has been.

She goes on to talk about how she saw a television movie based on a woman who was diagnosed with a debilitating disease, and apparently her doctor falls in love with her. When she learns her diagnosis, her plan was to leave the country to go about her business and carry out her personal wishes. The doctor, being the shining knight he is, went after her in an attempt to stop her. Before she could leave the country, they talked, and she opted to stay with him rather than do what she wanted. Dependence over independence. Not exactly the portrayal Mairs or I want to see.

I'll probably expound even more upon that essay at a later time, but I definitely recommend reading it. I'm sorry if I gave the wrong name, I don't have my english textbook near me to clarify.

SPA 111 - Introduction to Spanish. "Why are you in this class?" I'm sure you're asking me that right now. The credit hours, duh. I actually had the option to challenge the course and go ahead and take the final exam, but I passed on that. Was the dumb of me, knowing I probably could have aced it? Probably. I like my current teachers though! Carrie Carman is awesome, down to earth, and very knowledgeable. Hopefully my girlfriend won't hate her too much, haha. Kidding!

My Spanish lab teacher, Sra. Cavenaugh, is cool too, and she's giving me my first job as a Spanish tutor. I'm finally going to be making that money! But yeah, the Spanish class and lab are both pretty basic stuff.

And finally SOC 210 - Intro to Sociology. Our teacher has been gone since day one due to an emergency operation on her gallbladder, so I wish her a speedy recovery. We've watched videos on Cuban and Chinese Americans, so that' all I can pretty much say. My good friend David is in that class, so that's a bonus.

I realized that this blog was long, but I had to bring all of you readers up to speed on what was happening in my life. I'm growing up! College life isn't as glamorous as all of the frat comedy movies make it out to be, though. Maybe when I make it university it'll be more exciting.

However, I'm looking forward to my time here at LCC, and can only hope that I will push my boundaries as a student. Here's to high hopes!

-Mario

The Earth Will Shake.

It's so hard to find good help these days...

Where I live, it's hard to find people who appreciate the same music as I do, or people who play an instrument with an interest in my taste in music. If I were to start a band, I would want other members to throw in their own ideas, but I just can't seem to find these kinds of people in Kinston, NC.

I have an idea of who I could possibly start a band with, but it just wouldn't work out right now unfortunately. Maybe when I go off to university it'll work out.

But if you are reading this, and you worship bands like Cursed, His Hero Is Gone, Tragedy, etc, get into contact with me! I need live music in my life.

I knew this blog would come sooner than later...

Religion is a touchy subject, especially when you're around the wrong people. Some people have it force fed to them when they are young, and some see it as an alternative to a bad lifestyle. For me, it was the former. I guess in the course of life, we all have our unanswered questions, and yet, who do we direct them to? Could their possibly be a higher being?

I'd say within the last 2 years I became an atheist of sorts. I phrase it like that because I choose not to believe in a god, but I also haven't properly explored religions beyond Christianity. Am I going to burn up in hell when I die for refusing Jesus Christ as my personal savior? I guess that's for ignorance to decide. I choose not to think about what will happen after I die, not because I'm scared or confused, but because I just can't think of things getting much better or worse after we die (i.e. heaven or hell).

What made me start thinking this way? Well, I'm kind of a young guy, and around this time of the average person's life, it's probably considered normal to question the existence of a god. While this is true, it is not the main factor, obviously. You get to thinking about the danger that religion can bring to this world: holy wars, aggression, ignorance, the fucking hippies, overzealous fools blinded by their own teachings, etc. Mostly, it's the violence. The war on terror, the war on drugs, the war on bullshit; it all translates back to the Christian right that this bigot country was founded upon. Don't call me a good patriot, don't call me a bad person. These are all just my feelings.

But for others, religion can bring joy to people, especially in this country. Some people often find it difficult to make it through the day, and it is possible that religion is what keeps them here. People find safety in religion. This is the positive side that I'm sure most of us could agree on. My parents are, always have been, and always will be catholic. My dad prays with his rosary almost every time he enters his car, just so he can have a safe trip to wherever he goes. My parents believe that god puts you on this earth, but it is on you to take care of what you need to accomplish.

Hell, even once in a while I'll go to church with my parents. No, my flesh is not set ablaze as soon as I enter the church, but it does feel a bit weird. Why do I ever go to church? To make my parents happy, of course! Church is another way (for some people) to bring families together. It gives people the opportunity of communication with one another, something that this world lacks more and more. For some people, it brings a smile to their face. And in the end, isn't that what we all eventually want?

I see the pro's and con's of religion. It can obviously tie into various political topics I feel strong about, whether it's the fact I'm pro-choice or for gay marriage. People will never completely see eye to eye, and that's what religion eats away at. Religion just gives us another reason to fight. My god is better than your god!

I don't have faith in a god, but I do believe in certain things. I believe that the love of others can help me get through the day. I believe that making someone laugh or smile is doing some good for this world. People need to be more happy, as cliche as that sounds.

Basically, as I just said, I think people need to believe in something. Whether it is a god, several gods, love, trust, bullshit, etc. No matter how adamant a person is about atheism, they have to believe in something, right? Most times, they believe in Darwinism! There's something. I respect any of your beliefs. I may strongly disagree, but I respect them. I love the way I choose to see life, and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.

-Mario

The Earth Will Shake.

Let's put a smile on that face.

As I begin to type this blog, it is currently 5:40 AM Eastern Time. My usual summers consist of laziness, joblessness, and an abundance of freedom. All of this wasted time gives me a lot of time to reflect on random things, whether it is the amazingness of The Dark Knight, or seeing Skeletonwitch for the second time. We'll go with the latter.



My good Wilmington bud Ryan (Ryhan, Ryhan of the Shire, Most crucial dude ever, etc.) did me a huge favor and came to pick me up this past Thursday afternoon from Wilmington, which is about an hour and a half from my area. Considering how ridiculous gas prices are these days, that's awesome he'd go out of his way to this. Of course, I helped him out a little bit on gas, and we were on the way.

Got to his place a little after 7, so we decide to waste some time, seeing as the show probably wouldn't start for a good while. Played the new Soul Calibur game, which I seriously brought the anti-lulz. For you non /B/tards, that means I sucked. Very badly, I might add. Ate some amazing steak and mac & cheese that his mom hooked us up with, and caught a tiny bit of a Christina Ricci flick where she plays a nymphomaniac; the title of the film slips me now. But, onward with the story!

We head out for Lucky's Pub, obviously the venue where the show was located, and it starts pouring like motherfucking Chris Crocker. Do we give a shit? Yes. Syke. Or psyche. However the fuck you want to spell it, you ass. We get in there, and I see some familiar faces, so that's cool. I'm pretty sure it took forever and a day for the show to actually start (Mark, the owner of Lucky's seems pretty notorious for starting shows at least an hour late :p), but what the hell, it was worth it.


Death Machine Weapons - Courtesy of Ryan Wishnia
www.myspace.com/deathmachineweapons

Probably the most entertaining band out of Wilmington opened the show; the all mighty Death Machine Weapons. I'd previously seen them once, coincidentally with Skeletonwitch... good memories. While power metal is far off from my personal music taste, these guys definitely know how to have fun with it. The singer definitely loves to make a theatrical appearance, and instead of coming out as a samurai as he did before, he came out with a sheet covering his body -- a ghost.

I recognized a couple of tracks they did, and they even managed to play a new one, which was definitely a departure from their other material. To me, it sounded more southern/sludge influenced, so that was interesting. I wish I knew the name of the song, but they played a Spanish styled song, and that's always my personal favorite. Kudos to those dudes, hope to see them again.


Rapture Cabaret - Courtesy of Stuart Chamberlain
www.myspace.com/rapturecabaret

Some great dudes are in this band, so it was a pleasure to finally see them again. Will, the bassist and Dan, stage right guitar are always great, and I believe this was the first time seeing Will play with the group. Hearing them live, you can obviously hear the Gothenburg styled playing, which was pulled off very well. My only personal gripe with this band is not in the music, but how the singer (don't get me wrong, guy seems great) kind of milks it onstage. One of those "I scream everything on stage instead of talking" and almost looks like he's posing for a camera at times.

All differences aside, this group definitely brought some well structured metal into the picture, and big ups to Will and Dan. Hope you dudes keep up the serious riffage up!


Gollum - Courtesy of P. Kendall
www.myspace.com/gollum

I mean no personal disrespect towards this band, but man, they were all over the place... unfortunately I don't mean that in the best way possible. Take one part Faith No More, one part High On Fire, add a little wankery, and you get this band. Sounds like it would be awesome, right? I don't mean to be rude, but I guess it's an acquired taste. Not to mention the very eerie projections showcased behind the band; I felt like I should have been on psychedelics. Not to turn any of you away, check them out anyway, and support them if you enjoy what you hear.


Skeletonwitch - Courtesy of Heather Stumpf
www.myspace.com/skeletonwitch

Worship the fucking Witch! Pretty much all that needs to be said is confined into those words, but I'll go into detail, haha. I've only had the pleasure of seeing Skeletonwitch twice, but they are creeping up as one of my favorite live bands. All really nice guys playing nasty thrash/death/black/random subgenre for metal; that combined with excellent stage energy provides for an amazing performance.

The setlist was much more varied this time around; they pulled out some older gems and obviously played a good deal of tracks from their latest lp, Beyond The Permafrost. Personal favorites were "Upon Wings Of Black", "Baptized In Flames", "Soul Thrashing Black Sorcery" and "Vengeance Will Be Mine". Picking favorites is always difficult, though, seeing as they played such a stellar set.

No more needs to me set about the show! Go out and support Skeletonwitch, and more importantly, your local scene! Whether you're into rap, jazz, country, metal, hardcore, or what have you, we all start with DIY roots. Get out there and help some of the struggling bands that deserve your time!

Big ups again to Ryan and everyone at Lucky's Pub. Wilmington shows never disappoint!

-Mario

Currently listening to:

Trash Talk - s/t
Disfear - Live The Storm
Skeletonwitch - Beyond The Permafrost

The Earth Will Shake.

Welcome one, welcome all...

If you're reading this, chances are you don't get out much. But in all seriousness, I thought it'd be a good idea to start blogging again (Xanga wasn't very appealing) since I've just been filled with so many emotions recently. As cliche as that sounds, that's probably why any of us blog; to let out our own emotions through a special message -- blogging.

My name is Mario Espinoza, and I can't even think of how to properly begin my first blog. I currently reside in Kinston, North Carolina; a town with more hopes than accomplishments. While it is a town of never ending monotony, I think it is a great town to raise children. A place of comfort and morale. This opposes my original home, Queens, New York; the place where I feel my heart will always reside.

I graduated from Kinston High School a little over a month ago, and I have a little less than a month before I enter the local community college. I know I'm supposed to feel a little uneasy about entering college, but I have a very good feeling about it. See, throughout high school (I cannot tell a lie!) I was a constant fuck up. I don't want you thinking I'm being too hard on myself, because I'm not. I failed numerous classes that I could have done extremely well in had I put in the effort, I missed classes more than most people I know... It actually comes as a surprise that I graduated on time. Most adults would say "Oh, he's a bright kid, he just lacks the motivation." Don't you just fucking hate cliches such as that one? I know I'm intelligent when I want to be, and I have all the motivation in the world; I just choose to occasionally ignore it. Does that make me a bad person? You're damn right it does.

That brings me to my next, and probably one of my most important points: I feel like I was born and will die angry. Not to say that I will abandon friends and family, but I will always have a chip on my shoulder about something. Anger gives me the power to write blogs, as it also does for many other creative writers. For me, I would go as far as to say anger is a necessity in life, which it obviously is for everyone, regardless of your ideals. Specifically for me, though, it creates a barrier between you and I. It can be the current state of America, it can be the music seeping through my ears, or it can be the most trivial arguement; anger is a part of me.

Anger aside, there are certain aspects that keep me sane! For a mere 17 yeard old, I'd like to think I have certain things at this age that a lot don't. For one, I have a great relationship with all of my family, and most certainly my wonderful girlfriend. Yes ladies, I hate to break your hearts, but I am taken. Her name is Mary, and she is the greatest woman you or I will ever meet. Right about now, I know what you're thinking, I can't be in love at only 17! Well fuck you, ladies and gentlemen, because I can be. That is that. :)

Good friendship is also a key ingredient to making me as happy as possible. Throughout life you see friends come and you see friends go. I just hope the ones I've had the longest will continue to fight the good fight with me. Dudes and dudettes, I love you all.

Another important aspect of my life - music. Where would I be without it? No matter who you are, what culture you are a part of, I think we can all agree on the fact that music is essential to healthy living. My personal musical taste ranges through a wide variety of artists and genres. I hate saying "I'll listen to just about anything", because it is a lie. I will definitely give any artist a chance, regardless of my taste. However, that may not mean I will enjoy it! For a preview of bands and artists I enjoy head over to my last.fm: http://www.last.fm/user/HellhammerMario

For now, I think this is enough for my first blog. What can you expect in future blogs? You can expect blogs from the heart, touching on a variety of subjects. From time to time, I will also post links to albums that are incredible in my personal opinion. I hope to hear from some of you readers!


-Mario

Currently listening to:

Radiohead discography
Cursed - III
Blacklisted - Heavier Than Heaven, Lonelier Than God
Mono - You Are There

The Earth Will Shake.