Welcome one, welcome all...

If you're reading this, chances are you don't get out much. But in all seriousness, I thought it'd be a good idea to start blogging again (Xanga wasn't very appealing) since I've just been filled with so many emotions recently. As cliche as that sounds, that's probably why any of us blog; to let out our own emotions through a special message -- blogging.

My name is Mario Espinoza, and I can't even think of how to properly begin my first blog. I currently reside in Kinston, North Carolina; a town with more hopes than accomplishments. While it is a town of never ending monotony, I think it is a great town to raise children. A place of comfort and morale. This opposes my original home, Queens, New York; the place where I feel my heart will always reside.

I graduated from Kinston High School a little over a month ago, and I have a little less than a month before I enter the local community college. I know I'm supposed to feel a little uneasy about entering college, but I have a very good feeling about it. See, throughout high school (I cannot tell a lie!) I was a constant fuck up. I don't want you thinking I'm being too hard on myself, because I'm not. I failed numerous classes that I could have done extremely well in had I put in the effort, I missed classes more than most people I know... It actually comes as a surprise that I graduated on time. Most adults would say "Oh, he's a bright kid, he just lacks the motivation." Don't you just fucking hate cliches such as that one? I know I'm intelligent when I want to be, and I have all the motivation in the world; I just choose to occasionally ignore it. Does that make me a bad person? You're damn right it does.

That brings me to my next, and probably one of my most important points: I feel like I was born and will die angry. Not to say that I will abandon friends and family, but I will always have a chip on my shoulder about something. Anger gives me the power to write blogs, as it also does for many other creative writers. For me, I would go as far as to say anger is a necessity in life, which it obviously is for everyone, regardless of your ideals. Specifically for me, though, it creates a barrier between you and I. It can be the current state of America, it can be the music seeping through my ears, or it can be the most trivial arguement; anger is a part of me.

Anger aside, there are certain aspects that keep me sane! For a mere 17 yeard old, I'd like to think I have certain things at this age that a lot don't. For one, I have a great relationship with all of my family, and most certainly my wonderful girlfriend. Yes ladies, I hate to break your hearts, but I am taken. Her name is Mary, and she is the greatest woman you or I will ever meet. Right about now, I know what you're thinking, I can't be in love at only 17! Well fuck you, ladies and gentlemen, because I can be. That is that. :)

Good friendship is also a key ingredient to making me as happy as possible. Throughout life you see friends come and you see friends go. I just hope the ones I've had the longest will continue to fight the good fight with me. Dudes and dudettes, I love you all.

Another important aspect of my life - music. Where would I be without it? No matter who you are, what culture you are a part of, I think we can all agree on the fact that music is essential to healthy living. My personal musical taste ranges through a wide variety of artists and genres. I hate saying "I'll listen to just about anything", because it is a lie. I will definitely give any artist a chance, regardless of my taste. However, that may not mean I will enjoy it! For a preview of bands and artists I enjoy head over to my last.fm: http://www.last.fm/user/HellhammerMario

For now, I think this is enough for my first blog. What can you expect in future blogs? You can expect blogs from the heart, touching on a variety of subjects. From time to time, I will also post links to albums that are incredible in my personal opinion. I hope to hear from some of you readers!


-Mario

Currently listening to:

Radiohead discography
Cursed - III
Blacklisted - Heavier Than Heaven, Lonelier Than God
Mono - You Are There

The Earth Will Shake.