Post-birthday joke

Yeah, I just turned 18. I will be hitting the clubs when I go to New York next week.

But more importantly, I came up with an amazing joke not ten minutes ago. Here goes:

---What do you call the act of using fruit as a sexual aphrodisiac?
-Umm, gee whilikers, dude, I dunno! What do you call that.

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Statuatory grape.


Bahahahaha.

I'm not dead...

Not yet!

I've been without a laptop for a little bit, so I haven't posted in over a month. Unfortunately, I don't have much to say other than I'm glad to almost be done with my first semester of school. I wrote a paper on the Ejército Zapatista de Liberación Nacional for my Spanish class, and I might post that at some point.

My birthday is in a few days, finals are almost over, and the holidays are here. I'm off to New York next week to celebrate the holidays with my family minus my sister. Fun times.

Fuck public transportation...

Seriously, nothing more needs to be said.

Yeah, I know I'm not 18...

It pisses me off that people over 18 are quick to silence those not of age simply because of the age difference. What kind of bullshit is that? I have an opinion, and even though it technically won't matter in this election, I have the right to express my opinion.

That being said, I don't want to get too idealistic, but I just can't help but be baffled by Palin supporters. And while she isn't running for president, she may have to eventually fill the position. A woman that won't answer a question directly, religiously force fed, and let's face it, just so fucking idiotic. I'm all for the rights of women, and I would definitely love to see a woman in the White House one day, but fuck, not her.

Another thing that scares me is a possible assassination attack on Barack Obama. Obviously with the constant threats being taken care of, it makes me feel a little more at ease. However, I just get to thinking how this situation would put us back decades, and how we would have to work that much harder to better this country.

And so, I have decided that if Senator Obama is assassinated in his tenure as president, I am moving to Canada. You think I'm bullshitting you, but as I'm growing older, I think about it more and more. It's just the mere fact that a lot of people in this country waste their brilliance on ignorant matters. Can we not accept a man of color, nay, HALF color in our oval office? God forbid what would happen if a full African American entered the White House.

Most people making this threat to exit the country seem to only be behind the idea if John McCain is elected. I don't think I'd move out of this place if that were the case, but another important factor to keep in mind is whether how much life is left in that man? I appreciate McCain's services and everything positive he has done for this country, but I'm not a supporter, that's all.

Bottom line: Fuck you for thinking that people under 18 shouldn't voice their opinion, and if Obama is assassinated or Palin takes over the White House, I'm knocking at Chris Colohan's door and telling him to get Cursed and The Swarm back together (in that order).

Fuck you very much,

Mario

Unnecessary Person(s)

I haven't posted in about a month, so I figured I'd get off my ass and type something up here. This evening, I'm here to talk to you about how there is an overabundance of photographers these days.

Now, I have two close friends that are stellar amateur photographers, and I appreciate and support their work. What pisses me off though is how pretty much everyone these days thinks they can point their camera at an object and call it "art" or "photography in its truest form." These kids consist of 15 year old, "political" hippies. They take a camera, go into a field of exuberant flowers, snap photographs at terrible angles, go onto their computers that their filthy rich parents spoiled them with, and photoshop the crap out of said photographs.

What do I say to these youngsters? Fuck them. Fuck every single thing about them. Just as in any other art form, support the artists that pour their complete being into their work. Support artists that show heart, emotion, and invoke thought through their respective art.

Plugs:



David G. Photography
www.myspace.com/davidgphotos



Shire Photography
www.myspace.com/ryanwphoto


Dianna Augustine Photography (Professional photographer)
http://www.flickr.com/photos/d_saygoodbye/

Wake me when it's springtime in heaven...

That's my little babe, Kaitlin Espinoza. She was always independent, outgoing, but still very warm and sweet. She made me smile when I didn't think I had one in me. She showed me how attached a pet owner could get to the pet. :)

I will always remember the times she would wake me up in the middle of the night and crawl right between my legs. I will always remember finding her sprawled out on my living room couch late at night. I will always remember how cute she looked playing with string. I will always remember holding her in my arms, rocking her to sleep. I will remember the first time she came to my house on my father's birthday. I will always remember loving her just as I love my sister. I will always remember Kaitlin, no matter what.

If there's a heaven I believe in, it's kitty heaven. I know you're there, babe, and you're going to live in happiness, where pain isn't in the dictionary.

I love you Kaitlin, and I'm going to miss you.

RIP

Just take deep breaths...

Recently, a girl I knew in high school had to deal with losing her current partner.  Obviously she wasn't the only one effected by the unexpected death of her loved one; I can't even begin to imagine what it must be like to bury your own child.  Life is beautiful, and it can harshly be snatched away in an instant. 

So, I got to thinking.  I thought about a lot of the trivial things I've argued with my girlfriend about, and really, how pointless some of it was.  Even today, I've said things that make me seem like a real jerkoff.  Why do I say these things?  Sometimes, I really don't even know.

But, what if it was Mary that was taken away?  A woman that I've been in love with for almost 3 years, just suddenly taken from me?  How does one, especially a person as young as I am or the girl who lost her boyfriend, learn to deal with such great pain?  Is it possible?

It's sad that it takes the death of another to make me thankful for some of the things and people I have in my life.  Some people, unfortunately, never get to experience falling in love.  They can never fathom the feeling of just staring into their partners' eyes and doing absolutely nothing else, but yet not wanting to do anything else.  Why would you want to?

Almost 3 years, and I love this woman more than I ever have before.  

And to the girl who has been so devastated, so broken-hearted, I am sorry.  Life is unpredictable, and even though we can never truly change it, we have others to support us in our time of need.

I never knew you, but wherever you may roam, I hope you are at peace.

RIP Adam Howard.